About 6 years ago or so, my Mom bought the same Christmas gift for my daughter and her two cousins that are close in age; a snowman head. It's a pillow really, yet kind of hard to use as such because of the loooonnnnnnnnggggggggggg carrot nose. But it IS cute and SOOOO soft. My daughter kept it on her bed for a couple years until she felt she'd outgrown the little-girl-stuffed animal stage. She did not want Mr. Snowman anymore.
Summer came, and along with it, the drill team annual garage sale. All the girls on the team contribute items to be sold in order to earn money for their Fall trip to California. My daughter decided to sell her snowman head. After all, Gma never comes into her bedroom and never asks about Mr. Snowman, so she'll never know, right? WRONG! Gma is a garage sale junkie.
Gma had moved to Santaquin though, so who would've thought she'd hear about, let alone come, to a Mapleton garage sale, when there were probably hundreds of garage sales going on all over the place, but come to this one she did. Would she remember or even recognize Mr. Snowman? Of course she did. He's quite unique. She asked the host about the garage sale and found out it was being hosted by the SHS drill team, so my Mom asked if a girl by my daughter's name had contributed Mr. Snowman. Indeed she had. BUSTED!!!
Now my Mom could've been hurt, disappointed, or upset, but she was able to chuckle about it and came up with the brilliant idea to buy Mr. Snowman (again), hang onto him until Christmas, and then re-gift him to...........my daughter. Hilarious! Now every year since then, they pass that snowman back and forth, coming up with creative ways to package him up, wondering if the other will guess what the gift is (as real gifts are given too). My husband thinks they should both "get over it already" and cease this silliness. But I think it's a wonderful thing. It's a reminder every year, of a situation that could've caused discomfort, maybe even bitterness, but has rather fostered a fun relationship in sharing a private (not so private anymore) joke that causes them to laugh and love. A gift is a gift, from someone you love, whether it's something you use or not isn't important.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Sunday, December 19, 2010
A Heavenly Home
A couple weeks ago I taught a lesson in Relief Society that I wanted to share with my family, including our married children. A had the nagging feeling that I always spend a lot of time preparing nice lessons for others to hear, but I never do the same for my own family, so I decided it was about time I do something about that.
This was a silent lesson, as far as talking goes. I have pictures depicting Christ's hands from babyhood through the ressurrection. I have had these pictures for over a decade and have loved them, but the thought came to me that they would be even more powerful set to music. I was able to choose songs that I love, and I found the perfect ones to go with all 9 pictures. There's also a scripture for each one. So...the way it worked is, I would post the first scripture and picture, and everyone could look up the scripture and read it to themselves as the song was playing. There was a small pause between songs while I posted the next scripture and picture. There was no talking. The entire thing takes 40 minutes.
I thought about my two adorable grandchildren, ages 2 and 19 months. I knew it would be completely unrealistic, even ridiculous to expect these little ones to be quiet, therefore I modified my expectations of tonight's lesson. I told everyone before we started, not to worry about the little ones, to let them play, and we would just get out of the lesson whatever we could.
When the music started, all was quiet. There was a reverant, peaceful feeling in the room. The grandchildren, without ever being prompted or instructed in any way, played in the most reverant way I've ever seen, even speaking in a whisper. These two special little people are typically hyper when they see each other and they sometimes try to "one-up" each other in their cute antics. Not tonight, or at least not during those 40 minutes. They were the sweetest little angels.
Our two year old granddaughter spent her time methodically building a pedestal with blocks. Then, without fanfare, she quietly stepped up on her pedestal and started waving her arm as if leading the music. She moved her lips as if singing the song. She had a reverant, respectful, angelic look on her face as she did so.
At the conclusion of the lesson, I bore my testimony, sharing my story of when I really KNEW that Christ's atonement applied to me personally. I had shared my story with my older children, but not my younger three (at least not in full). Ironically, my happiest, most joyful moment of my life, was at the passing of our firstborn son.
Brandon was born healthy, however 2 weeks later, he was very sick and was admitted to the hospital, where he died 36 hours later. It was a rare staff infection that shut down his organs, poisoned his blood, and took his life. A cause is still not known for omphilitis, nor a cure. I had complete faith that he could be healed, and my prayers were uttered with that healing request. Brandon was moved up to NICU, where he hovered between life and death. I would retreat to the bathroom over and over and over again, PLEADING for his life to be spared, exercising all my faith and love in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, to use their healing power on my son.
The words always came to my mind, that I needed to say "Thy Will Be Done", but I didn't want to do it; consciously REFUSING to say those words. I realized that my pleas were turning from begging, to commanding God what to do. The nurses were honest with us and told us that they were surprised Brandon was still with us. Specialists all over the world were consulted on his case, and all were stymied. A few hours later, we were asked to give permission for Brandon to have a complete blood transfusion. It was then that I retreated to the bathroom one last time. I knelt on that cold, tile floor, and pleaded with Father in Heaven, as I felt my heart was literally breaking, and I felt such pain in my sorrow and time of need, yet as I once again pleaded for Brandon's life to be spared, the words "Thy Will Be Done" were again brought to mind, and this time I knew I HAD to say them, and truly turn the matter over to the Lord.
What happened next was the most spiritual, incredible experience I've ever had in my life, and one on which I draw on from time to time to remind myself of the answers I received that day. I have always believed in Jesus Christ and His atonement, but never until this day, had it sunk in, that he did what he did for ME; that he not only atoned for our sins, but also for our hurts and pains and sorrows.
As I uttered those words "Thy Will Be Done", I truly meant them, knowing Heavenly Father knew what would be best for little Brandon. As soon as I spoke those words, the most incredible warmth that is hard to describe, completely enveloped me, as if arms were wrapped around me. In that moment, I KNEW that yes, Heavenly Father loved ME, and that he and my Savior were aware of ME and my pain at that particular moment, and that the Savior had suffered for me already. I also knew that Brandon would be called home, to his heavenly home. The words came to my mind, "everything will be OK". Those words were a constant mantra going on in my head for quite a while, and the warmth that encompassed me carried me through the next few difficult hours, and days ahead.
As I ended my prayer and headed back to the waiting room, a nurse immediately came out and told us that Brandon was not going to make it and did we want to hold him. Although filled with grief, I knew it would be OK. I knew that the love I felt for my sweet baby boy, could not even compare to the love Heavenly Father has for him, as well as for me, and each of us. I said goodbye to my son, but knew it wasn't really goodbye.
Tender mercies were shown to me throughout my experience. #1) I knew I would be quitting my job after my baby was born, yet I didn't feel I should give official notice until later, so I just took an indefinite maternity leave. My boss, who also handled the insurance for the company, asked me if I wanted to add my baby to our insurance. I told her No, because I knew that after he was born, I'd most likely tell them my intentions of quitting. When I notified her of his birth, she again asked me if I wanted to add him to the insurance. Again I said No. Two weeks later, I called her from the hospital after Brandon had been moved to the NICU, and told her the situation and asked if it was too late to add him to the insurance. I dreaded her answer, as surely I WAS too late, and how wrong it was for me to wait until there was a problem, and then request the blessings of insurance. This woman answered immediately, without pause, "Done...he's on your insurance as of NOW"! Hours later he was gone. Thousands and thousands of dollars was covered by my insurance plan. A few weeks later, I was able to return to my job, which was truly a blessing. #2 Brandon hung on, until I could accept the fact that he wasn't meant to stay with us. I KNOW he hung on for me, and as soon as I had received my answer in that tiny hospital bathroom and felt peace and acceptance, he was gone within minutes. #3 The hospital had taken newborn pictures of him, which we never intended to purchase, thinking that we'd take plenty of pictures ourselves. Three weeks following his death, a packet of pictures arrived in the mail from the hospital. Tender mercies continued to feed my spirit, and testified to me, where my blessings come from.
At one point prior to Brandon's death, I felt such intense pain in my heart, I wondered if I might be having a heart attack. I felt as though there were a hole right through my heart. Over time, my heart was healed. The scar is still there, which is a reminder of the good that came out of the heartbreaking experience, but it is healed.
I cried as I shared my story, not from sadness, but from the joy I felt at receiving the answer I did, in the way I did, and how powerful that experience was, and how it has carried me through life many, many times.
I felt a special, sweet spirit in our home tonight. It felt like a heavenly home, at least for that brief time. That feeling comes and goes in our home, as life happens, but those moments, however brief they might be, are precious, and I am filled with a longing for our true heavenly home.
This was a silent lesson, as far as talking goes. I have pictures depicting Christ's hands from babyhood through the ressurrection. I have had these pictures for over a decade and have loved them, but the thought came to me that they would be even more powerful set to music. I was able to choose songs that I love, and I found the perfect ones to go with all 9 pictures. There's also a scripture for each one. So...the way it worked is, I would post the first scripture and picture, and everyone could look up the scripture and read it to themselves as the song was playing. There was a small pause between songs while I posted the next scripture and picture. There was no talking. The entire thing takes 40 minutes.
I thought about my two adorable grandchildren, ages 2 and 19 months. I knew it would be completely unrealistic, even ridiculous to expect these little ones to be quiet, therefore I modified my expectations of tonight's lesson. I told everyone before we started, not to worry about the little ones, to let them play, and we would just get out of the lesson whatever we could.
When the music started, all was quiet. There was a reverant, peaceful feeling in the room. The grandchildren, without ever being prompted or instructed in any way, played in the most reverant way I've ever seen, even speaking in a whisper. These two special little people are typically hyper when they see each other and they sometimes try to "one-up" each other in their cute antics. Not tonight, or at least not during those 40 minutes. They were the sweetest little angels.
Our two year old granddaughter spent her time methodically building a pedestal with blocks. Then, without fanfare, she quietly stepped up on her pedestal and started waving her arm as if leading the music. She moved her lips as if singing the song. She had a reverant, respectful, angelic look on her face as she did so.
At the conclusion of the lesson, I bore my testimony, sharing my story of when I really KNEW that Christ's atonement applied to me personally. I had shared my story with my older children, but not my younger three (at least not in full). Ironically, my happiest, most joyful moment of my life, was at the passing of our firstborn son.
Brandon was born healthy, however 2 weeks later, he was very sick and was admitted to the hospital, where he died 36 hours later. It was a rare staff infection that shut down his organs, poisoned his blood, and took his life. A cause is still not known for omphilitis, nor a cure. I had complete faith that he could be healed, and my prayers were uttered with that healing request. Brandon was moved up to NICU, where he hovered between life and death. I would retreat to the bathroom over and over and over again, PLEADING for his life to be spared, exercising all my faith and love in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, to use their healing power on my son.
The words always came to my mind, that I needed to say "Thy Will Be Done", but I didn't want to do it; consciously REFUSING to say those words. I realized that my pleas were turning from begging, to commanding God what to do. The nurses were honest with us and told us that they were surprised Brandon was still with us. Specialists all over the world were consulted on his case, and all were stymied. A few hours later, we were asked to give permission for Brandon to have a complete blood transfusion. It was then that I retreated to the bathroom one last time. I knelt on that cold, tile floor, and pleaded with Father in Heaven, as I felt my heart was literally breaking, and I felt such pain in my sorrow and time of need, yet as I once again pleaded for Brandon's life to be spared, the words "Thy Will Be Done" were again brought to mind, and this time I knew I HAD to say them, and truly turn the matter over to the Lord.
What happened next was the most spiritual, incredible experience I've ever had in my life, and one on which I draw on from time to time to remind myself of the answers I received that day. I have always believed in Jesus Christ and His atonement, but never until this day, had it sunk in, that he did what he did for ME; that he not only atoned for our sins, but also for our hurts and pains and sorrows.
As I uttered those words "Thy Will Be Done", I truly meant them, knowing Heavenly Father knew what would be best for little Brandon. As soon as I spoke those words, the most incredible warmth that is hard to describe, completely enveloped me, as if arms were wrapped around me. In that moment, I KNEW that yes, Heavenly Father loved ME, and that he and my Savior were aware of ME and my pain at that particular moment, and that the Savior had suffered for me already. I also knew that Brandon would be called home, to his heavenly home. The words came to my mind, "everything will be OK". Those words were a constant mantra going on in my head for quite a while, and the warmth that encompassed me carried me through the next few difficult hours, and days ahead.
As I ended my prayer and headed back to the waiting room, a nurse immediately came out and told us that Brandon was not going to make it and did we want to hold him. Although filled with grief, I knew it would be OK. I knew that the love I felt for my sweet baby boy, could not even compare to the love Heavenly Father has for him, as well as for me, and each of us. I said goodbye to my son, but knew it wasn't really goodbye.
Tender mercies were shown to me throughout my experience. #1) I knew I would be quitting my job after my baby was born, yet I didn't feel I should give official notice until later, so I just took an indefinite maternity leave. My boss, who also handled the insurance for the company, asked me if I wanted to add my baby to our insurance. I told her No, because I knew that after he was born, I'd most likely tell them my intentions of quitting. When I notified her of his birth, she again asked me if I wanted to add him to the insurance. Again I said No. Two weeks later, I called her from the hospital after Brandon had been moved to the NICU, and told her the situation and asked if it was too late to add him to the insurance. I dreaded her answer, as surely I WAS too late, and how wrong it was for me to wait until there was a problem, and then request the blessings of insurance. This woman answered immediately, without pause, "Done...he's on your insurance as of NOW"! Hours later he was gone. Thousands and thousands of dollars was covered by my insurance plan. A few weeks later, I was able to return to my job, which was truly a blessing. #2 Brandon hung on, until I could accept the fact that he wasn't meant to stay with us. I KNOW he hung on for me, and as soon as I had received my answer in that tiny hospital bathroom and felt peace and acceptance, he was gone within minutes. #3 The hospital had taken newborn pictures of him, which we never intended to purchase, thinking that we'd take plenty of pictures ourselves. Three weeks following his death, a packet of pictures arrived in the mail from the hospital. Tender mercies continued to feed my spirit, and testified to me, where my blessings come from.
At one point prior to Brandon's death, I felt such intense pain in my heart, I wondered if I might be having a heart attack. I felt as though there were a hole right through my heart. Over time, my heart was healed. The scar is still there, which is a reminder of the good that came out of the heartbreaking experience, but it is healed.
I cried as I shared my story, not from sadness, but from the joy I felt at receiving the answer I did, in the way I did, and how powerful that experience was, and how it has carried me through life many, many times.
I felt a special, sweet spirit in our home tonight. It felt like a heavenly home, at least for that brief time. That feeling comes and goes in our home, as life happens, but those moments, however brief they might be, are precious, and I am filled with a longing for our true heavenly home.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Rat Race to Peace
I attended my youngest son's choir concert tonight. It's one of my favorite things to do. I found myself totally relaxed and enjoyed the evening immensely. I then realized that I only have 2 1/2 more years before he graduates, thus an end to all the running around to sporting events, fund raisers, concerts, volunteer work, and so much more. I remembered back, not too many years ago, when all six kids were in school, each involved in something, and it seemed like we were in a rat race all the time, running from one thing to another, but ya know what? I loved every minute of it.
My quest for the month of December has been to take the time to slow down enough to really enjoy the season; to experience it with all my senses. Is it really possible to "slow down" while in a rat race? Yes, it is. I realized tonight, after tiredly plopping down in my seat, that I could push other concerns aside and just enjoy the moment. I experienced pure joy watching my son perform and I allowed myself to be carried away in the music and feeling in the air.
We had been invited to a party this evening as well, but once home, I didn't want to shortchange my son and run off to one more thing. This was his night. I wanted to talk to him about it. My rat race ended at home.
My quest for the month of December has been to take the time to slow down enough to really enjoy the season; to experience it with all my senses. Is it really possible to "slow down" while in a rat race? Yes, it is. I realized tonight, after tiredly plopping down in my seat, that I could push other concerns aside and just enjoy the moment. I experienced pure joy watching my son perform and I allowed myself to be carried away in the music and feeling in the air.
We had been invited to a party this evening as well, but once home, I didn't want to shortchange my son and run off to one more thing. This was his night. I wanted to talk to him about it. My rat race ended at home.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Freaky Smiler
I was running around today trying to accomplish at least two week's worth of catch-up errands and grocery shopping, when I realized that I was scrunching my eyebrows and wearing a frown, so deep in concentration, thinking of all the tasks I needed to hurry and get done. That's when I remembered my last post.
So...I made a conscious decision, right then and there, to unscrunch, open up my eyes, notice my surroundings, turn on some Christmas music, and smile. While making a great effort to make eye contact with every driver I passed, ready to cheer them up as well as myself, I found that I might look a bit freaky, because by unscrunching my forehead and opening up my eyes, I had the look of a rather "surprised" and overly stressed woman, with a forced smile painted on my face. Oh well, it cheered ME up, and brought my focus back to things that matter.
I enjoyed the Christmas music as I drove. I made an unplanned stop at Deseret Book and just browsed, totally relaxed. I didn't buy a thing, but it was a good few moments to myself. Then on with the grocery shopping, which I always enjoy, knowing that those I love are waiting at home with hungry tummies and I get to go fill them.
Went out with hubby tonight and we're now relaxing together. That smile is still on my face. Forcing a smile over a frown, really works!
So...I made a conscious decision, right then and there, to unscrunch, open up my eyes, notice my surroundings, turn on some Christmas music, and smile. While making a great effort to make eye contact with every driver I passed, ready to cheer them up as well as myself, I found that I might look a bit freaky, because by unscrunching my forehead and opening up my eyes, I had the look of a rather "surprised" and overly stressed woman, with a forced smile painted on my face. Oh well, it cheered ME up, and brought my focus back to things that matter.
I enjoyed the Christmas music as I drove. I made an unplanned stop at Deseret Book and just browsed, totally relaxed. I didn't buy a thing, but it was a good few moments to myself. Then on with the grocery shopping, which I always enjoy, knowing that those I love are waiting at home with hungry tummies and I get to go fill them.
Went out with hubby tonight and we're now relaxing together. That smile is still on my face. Forcing a smile over a frown, really works!
Monday, November 29, 2010
Of Things That Matter Most
Pres. Uchtdorf has given me pause to think once again, about my priorities and what I can do to simplify my life.
Why is it that I am always running from one thing to the next? My husband has tried for years, to get me to just take a little time at night to sit down next to him to watch a TV show together (the WHOLE show, not just bits and pieces while running off to do a load of laundry or whatever else I feel just HAS to be done). I want to, but don't dare. It seems like a luxury, a waste of time. There's too much to be done, and if I don't do it, nobody will. Really? Does it matter?
But then...what DOES really matter most? It's absolutely relationships; with God, with family, with others, with self.
The Christmas season is here. Every year I have regrets on Dec. 26th that I didn't enjoy the season as I always anticipate I will. The reason? Because I'm too "busy" to enjoy it. I'm too "busy" to really "BE" with my kids. I'm too "busy" to really soak in all the sights and sounds and events. I'm always thinking of the next thing I need to get done.
I am pledging to myself, that THIS year really will be different. I WILL make time to sit on the couch by my husband. I WILL make time to spend with my kids. I will make prayer more meaningful. I will focus on the true meaning of Christmas. I will take stock of my frenzied schedule and see what I can change or cut out, in order to make time for the people and things that matter most.
Why is it that I am always running from one thing to the next? My husband has tried for years, to get me to just take a little time at night to sit down next to him to watch a TV show together (the WHOLE show, not just bits and pieces while running off to do a load of laundry or whatever else I feel just HAS to be done). I want to, but don't dare. It seems like a luxury, a waste of time. There's too much to be done, and if I don't do it, nobody will. Really? Does it matter?
But then...what DOES really matter most? It's absolutely relationships; with God, with family, with others, with self.
The Christmas season is here. Every year I have regrets on Dec. 26th that I didn't enjoy the season as I always anticipate I will. The reason? Because I'm too "busy" to enjoy it. I'm too "busy" to really "BE" with my kids. I'm too "busy" to really soak in all the sights and sounds and events. I'm always thinking of the next thing I need to get done.
I am pledging to myself, that THIS year really will be different. I WILL make time to sit on the couch by my husband. I WILL make time to spend with my kids. I will make prayer more meaningful. I will focus on the true meaning of Christmas. I will take stock of my frenzied schedule and see what I can change or cut out, in order to make time for the people and things that matter most.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
All That Jazz
My husband and I went to Salt Lake tonight to hear a mission friend play in a jazz band. It was part of an Art Expo thing going on, so we walked around and saw some interesting pieces of art before the band performed. I'd sure like to get inside the head of some of these artists and know what they know; feel what they feel, which causes them to paint what they do. Some pieces were stunning, making me look deeper and longer at the piece, and some made me uncomfortable. Interesting though. I do appreciate the arts.
The band's space to play was in an old building, almost like a garage, definitely a work space with half the ceiling still unfinished, shelving everywhere, dirty, no heat, only about 20 chairs set up, some shady people (one of which I actually witnessed stealing the "tip" jar, which was located up by the band, right in the middle of a song), and yet once the music started, I was transported to a whole other place.
As the music filled me, I felt it a shame that only a handful of people were there listening to this great music. A few more would wander in, some would wander out, not fully appreciating the talent right before them. But soon, with my toe tapping, my head boppin, and a smile on my face; the snow falling outside (indicative of a worrisome ride home), and all other cares of the world, didn't matter.
Jazz! Yah!!!
The band's space to play was in an old building, almost like a garage, definitely a work space with half the ceiling still unfinished, shelving everywhere, dirty, no heat, only about 20 chairs set up, some shady people (one of which I actually witnessed stealing the "tip" jar, which was located up by the band, right in the middle of a song), and yet once the music started, I was transported to a whole other place.
As the music filled me, I felt it a shame that only a handful of people were there listening to this great music. A few more would wander in, some would wander out, not fully appreciating the talent right before them. But soon, with my toe tapping, my head boppin, and a smile on my face; the snow falling outside (indicative of a worrisome ride home), and all other cares of the world, didn't matter.
Jazz! Yah!!!
Friday, November 12, 2010
The Best Sleep
When I was young, I remember visiting my Aunt and Uncle one day and they were anxious to show our family their separate, newly painted bedrooms. I was disturbed that they were happy to be in separate rooms. I feared their marriage was in trouble. It wasn't, nor is it.
Now, many years later, I understand. I have discovered that when my husband is out of town, and I have the bed all to myself, I sleep SO much better. Usually, I am up at least 3 times a night. I get so used to it that it just seems normal. Then when he's gone, I sometimes sleep the entire night without waking up, and the other nights, I'm up just once (to visit the restroom). I have been amazed at how good I feel the next day after sleep like that.
I don't feel bad for saying I like having my bed to myself. It's not about my relationship with my husband at all. It's only about sleep.
Will we be painting another room anytime soon? Most likely not. Earplugs may be all I need.
Now, many years later, I understand. I have discovered that when my husband is out of town, and I have the bed all to myself, I sleep SO much better. Usually, I am up at least 3 times a night. I get so used to it that it just seems normal. Then when he's gone, I sometimes sleep the entire night without waking up, and the other nights, I'm up just once (to visit the restroom). I have been amazed at how good I feel the next day after sleep like that.
I don't feel bad for saying I like having my bed to myself. It's not about my relationship with my husband at all. It's only about sleep.
Will we be painting another room anytime soon? Most likely not. Earplugs may be all I need.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Little ones at play
We had a birthday celebration for 2 yr. old granddaughter tonight as part of our Fast Sunday family dinner get-together. Our little grandson and granddaughter have not really had a lot to do with each other until recently. They've been curious about the other, but jealous of time on Gma or Gpa's lap, competing for our attention. Tonight they made the transition to actually playing.
It started off with grandson eyeing a toy granddaughter was playing with. He'd look for his chance to snatch a toy away, dive in and grab it, and RUN!!! She'd run after him and when she got close enough that he realized she would overtake him, he'd turn around and offer the toy (or drink or whatever) to her and say "dank do" (thank you). Then he'd watch her return to her solitary play, and he'd move in and do the grab-n-run again. It was so hilarious that I laughed so hard my jaw was hurting.
After the battle for the toys, they found that chasing each other was great fun. They ended up in my bathroom, exploring a drawer with curlers and trial-sized lotions etc. They were talking to each other and sharing, and having such a fun time. I do believe they are becoming great friends.
Gotta love little children.
It started off with grandson eyeing a toy granddaughter was playing with. He'd look for his chance to snatch a toy away, dive in and grab it, and RUN!!! She'd run after him and when she got close enough that he realized she would overtake him, he'd turn around and offer the toy (or drink or whatever) to her and say "dank do" (thank you). Then he'd watch her return to her solitary play, and he'd move in and do the grab-n-run again. It was so hilarious that I laughed so hard my jaw was hurting.
After the battle for the toys, they found that chasing each other was great fun. They ended up in my bathroom, exploring a drawer with curlers and trial-sized lotions etc. They were talking to each other and sharing, and having such a fun time. I do believe they are becoming great friends.
Gotta love little children.
Monday, November 1, 2010
Frito withdrawal
My sister and I have now completed one full month of no sugar. We have 11 months to go. It has been really hard for me, harder for me than for my sister. She likes sweets, but has never HAD to have them very often. I, on the other hand, have always craved sweets and can not finish a meal without wanting to top it off with dessert, or a piece of chocolate at the least.
Now yes, I've been on a healthy eating kick, and doing well, but I have still had my cheats. I was getting out of control with my chocolate and other sweets though so I had the bright idea of doing this contest with my sister and going a whole year without sweets. How dumb is that? Once I make up my mind though, I can be strong. But it is still hard. My taste buds want the sweet.
As if no sugar isn't challenge enough, I decided we should spice it up even more and add a new food each month that we can't have (healthy foods off limits of course), because as I mentioned before, even with healthy eating, we still have our cheats, so I'm trying to force us to get rid of those cheats, slowly but surely. So...today we chose for each other, a food (or drink) that the other can not have, under no circumstances, for the remainder of our year's challenge. I chose for her, no soda; no carbonated beverages at all. She loves diet coke, but doesn't drink it on a regular basis, so since this won't be torture for her, I attached to it that by eliminating other drinks of choice, she has to replace it with water and get 96-120 oz. of water each day. That's not as easy as it sounds, but with time, it does become a part of you. I ALWAYS have a water bottle with me now, everywhere I go. Water is SO good for you in so many ways, AND it helps the liver do its' job, by flushing out fat. So, can't go wrong there.
For ME, my sister chose my favorite salty treat of all time; Fritos. I yelled into the phone "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Without Fritos AND sweets, I am gonna die. This is the toughest thing I've done (or one of them anyway). BUT, I am NOT gonna lose to her.
The game is on!
Now yes, I've been on a healthy eating kick, and doing well, but I have still had my cheats. I was getting out of control with my chocolate and other sweets though so I had the bright idea of doing this contest with my sister and going a whole year without sweets. How dumb is that? Once I make up my mind though, I can be strong. But it is still hard. My taste buds want the sweet.
As if no sugar isn't challenge enough, I decided we should spice it up even more and add a new food each month that we can't have (healthy foods off limits of course), because as I mentioned before, even with healthy eating, we still have our cheats, so I'm trying to force us to get rid of those cheats, slowly but surely. So...today we chose for each other, a food (or drink) that the other can not have, under no circumstances, for the remainder of our year's challenge. I chose for her, no soda; no carbonated beverages at all. She loves diet coke, but doesn't drink it on a regular basis, so since this won't be torture for her, I attached to it that by eliminating other drinks of choice, she has to replace it with water and get 96-120 oz. of water each day. That's not as easy as it sounds, but with time, it does become a part of you. I ALWAYS have a water bottle with me now, everywhere I go. Water is SO good for you in so many ways, AND it helps the liver do its' job, by flushing out fat. So, can't go wrong there.
For ME, my sister chose my favorite salty treat of all time; Fritos. I yelled into the phone "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Without Fritos AND sweets, I am gonna die. This is the toughest thing I've done (or one of them anyway). BUT, I am NOT gonna lose to her.
The game is on!
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Halloween fun
I got to experience Halloween with grandchildren for the first time (they were too young last year), which is better than ever because I didn't have to be the one to stress over costumes or anything.
Our little grandson was dressed as Superman. He has discovered my treadmill and wanted to walk on it. We turned it on its' lowest setting and he walked and walked and walked, with his cape flowing out behind him. Cutest thing ever. Unfortunately, he didn't get to trick-or-treat because of the weather and a sick Daddy. He's too young to know what he's missing, and he's such a happy little boy with anything and everything. What a delight!
We went to our oldest son's house to go trick-or-treating with our granddaughter, who is almost 2 years old. She was dressed as a bunny. She was so tickled with her own costume that THAT could've entertained all of us all night long. When the weather cleared enough for us to venture outside and start the door approaches, she hopped down the sidewalk, just thrilled as could be. At her first house, when that first piece of candy landed in her bucket, her eyes got huge and she stared at it with a look on her face that registered pure joy and awe. It was the cutest thing ever. She jabbered and talked all night long, from house to house, enjoying seeing other kids dressed up, and seeing the fun and creative decorations on porches and windows and trees. She was enthralled. At one house, she was given a dumb-dumb sucker. As she was walking down the stairs, she pulled it out of her bucket and said "I don't want it". The very next house gave big suckers and she took that one and said "THAT'S a GOOD sucker!" So funny.
My daughter-in-law's parents were with us tonight too, so here were two sets of grandparents, and the parents of this one little girl, parading down the street, acting as though this little girl was the cutest, the smartest, the best little girl out there. (And she was.)
I love the constant reminders these little ones give us, of the simple joys in life. It doesn't take much to make them smile and laugh and be happy. Oh the lessons we learn from them.
I love my family!!!
Our little grandson was dressed as Superman. He has discovered my treadmill and wanted to walk on it. We turned it on its' lowest setting and he walked and walked and walked, with his cape flowing out behind him. Cutest thing ever. Unfortunately, he didn't get to trick-or-treat because of the weather and a sick Daddy. He's too young to know what he's missing, and he's such a happy little boy with anything and everything. What a delight!
We went to our oldest son's house to go trick-or-treating with our granddaughter, who is almost 2 years old. She was dressed as a bunny. She was so tickled with her own costume that THAT could've entertained all of us all night long. When the weather cleared enough for us to venture outside and start the door approaches, she hopped down the sidewalk, just thrilled as could be. At her first house, when that first piece of candy landed in her bucket, her eyes got huge and she stared at it with a look on her face that registered pure joy and awe. It was the cutest thing ever. She jabbered and talked all night long, from house to house, enjoying seeing other kids dressed up, and seeing the fun and creative decorations on porches and windows and trees. She was enthralled. At one house, she was given a dumb-dumb sucker. As she was walking down the stairs, she pulled it out of her bucket and said "I don't want it". The very next house gave big suckers and she took that one and said "THAT'S a GOOD sucker!" So funny.
My daughter-in-law's parents were with us tonight too, so here were two sets of grandparents, and the parents of this one little girl, parading down the street, acting as though this little girl was the cutest, the smartest, the best little girl out there. (And she was.)
I love the constant reminders these little ones give us, of the simple joys in life. It doesn't take much to make them smile and laugh and be happy. Oh the lessons we learn from them.
I love my family!!!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
The Call
The mission call has come. Our 3rd missionary to serve, is going to the Mexico Veracruz mission. He will enter the MTC in Feb.
It's interesting to reflect on each son's mission-call-opening. I really had no idea where any of them would be called to serve, except that with the two older boys, I had a feeling it would be in the states, and for this son, I had a feeling it would be OUTSIDE the states. Regardless of where they serve, the focus must be on what a mission is all about. It's not about where you get to go, or what sites you get to see, or if your destination is "cooler" than another's. It's about serving the Lord, and bringing the gospel to those who are waiting for those blessings in their lives. It requires faith in the Prophet and the Twelve, who are inspired as to where each boy needs to serve.
As each of my sons, in turn, read their letter telling them where they would serve, their expressions were all different, yet priceless. Son #1 got a big smile on his face and he had a glow about him. He couldn't stop smiling. I cried. Georgia would be where he would serve. It felt right, and SO good. Son #2 broke down in tears. He was overcome with the fact that the letter was signed by the Prophet, stating that he was worthy to serve a mission. It didn't matter where, although he too, felt Florida was right for him. And I cried. Son # 3, broke out into exclamations of joy and excitement, with his blue eyes expressing all he felt. And I cried. I, along with each boy, received a confirmation that THAT was where he truly needed to go. What an incredible, great feeling that is.
There are many great adventures and experiences in store for my son, but what I look forward to the most, is seeing that light that is in his eyes now, get even brighter, as it surely will, as he discovers his love for the people and a deeper love for the gospel and the Savior, than what he already feels now.
This will be a great time in his life. I love it!
It's interesting to reflect on each son's mission-call-opening. I really had no idea where any of them would be called to serve, except that with the two older boys, I had a feeling it would be in the states, and for this son, I had a feeling it would be OUTSIDE the states. Regardless of where they serve, the focus must be on what a mission is all about. It's not about where you get to go, or what sites you get to see, or if your destination is "cooler" than another's. It's about serving the Lord, and bringing the gospel to those who are waiting for those blessings in their lives. It requires faith in the Prophet and the Twelve, who are inspired as to where each boy needs to serve.
As each of my sons, in turn, read their letter telling them where they would serve, their expressions were all different, yet priceless. Son #1 got a big smile on his face and he had a glow about him. He couldn't stop smiling. I cried. Georgia would be where he would serve. It felt right, and SO good. Son #2 broke down in tears. He was overcome with the fact that the letter was signed by the Prophet, stating that he was worthy to serve a mission. It didn't matter where, although he too, felt Florida was right for him. And I cried. Son # 3, broke out into exclamations of joy and excitement, with his blue eyes expressing all he felt. And I cried. I, along with each boy, received a confirmation that THAT was where he truly needed to go. What an incredible, great feeling that is.
There are many great adventures and experiences in store for my son, but what I look forward to the most, is seeing that light that is in his eyes now, get even brighter, as it surely will, as he discovers his love for the people and a deeper love for the gospel and the Savior, than what he already feels now.
This will be a great time in his life. I love it!
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Another missionary
My son's mission papers are on their way to Salt Lake. We should find out by the end of the month where he will be called to serve.
We have been looking forward to this day for a little over 19 years now; teaching him, leading him, loving him, started making preparations last December, working on the paperwork since the beginning of summer, and now all we have to do is wait for the call.
When he told me about this last step being completed, and that everything is on its' way, I couldn't stop the tears from forming. What is my problem? This is a GOOD thing; something we've always hoped he would want to do. We have two other sons who have served missions and we know the blessings that come from serving in this way and how much this experience builds character and makes a man out of boys. There's so much good that comes from this, and yet...life changes from here on out. Changes are good, but change is change. I lose a piece of my little boy.
I'm not ready to say goodbye, yet this is what a mother must do. We can only nurture and protect for so long. I love this son of mine, and love the one who gave me this son, so...I will send him on his way with faith and love in my heart.
We have been looking forward to this day for a little over 19 years now; teaching him, leading him, loving him, started making preparations last December, working on the paperwork since the beginning of summer, and now all we have to do is wait for the call.
When he told me about this last step being completed, and that everything is on its' way, I couldn't stop the tears from forming. What is my problem? This is a GOOD thing; something we've always hoped he would want to do. We have two other sons who have served missions and we know the blessings that come from serving in this way and how much this experience builds character and makes a man out of boys. There's so much good that comes from this, and yet...life changes from here on out. Changes are good, but change is change. I lose a piece of my little boy.
I'm not ready to say goodbye, yet this is what a mother must do. We can only nurture and protect for so long. I love this son of mine, and love the one who gave me this son, so...I will send him on his way with faith and love in my heart.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Duel to the End!!
After "losing it" last night and gorging on pizza and doughnuts and soda, I realized how quickly my summer of good habits can go out the window. It scared me because I do not want to undo all the good I did during the summer. So...I challenged my sister to a duel.
We started today, Oct. 1st, with a resolve to not eat sugar for one year. We've got Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas to get through, but it's not like we'll NEVER get our favorite treats again EVER, and it's time to take action and not just talk about it.
I could never do this with any of my friends because we're too forgiving. If we slip up, we tell each other it's OK, that we deserved that treat. I need someone to push me. My sister is extremely competitive. She is strong and immovable when she has her mind made up. I never thought I was competitive myself, but when I'm with her and we play games, she wins more than I do and it really ticks me off. And then she gloats about it, which really riles me up. So, I knew she would be the one to do this challenge with.
I texted her this morning with my proposal. She jumped all over it, and said "I'm In...starting NOW" and she proceeded to throw away 1/2 a candybar she had in her desk at work. (I thought "crap...I've unleashed a monster!"
Throughout the day, we've come up with other ideas. This first month is no sugar, then on Nov. 1st, we have to add something to the list, and here's where it'll get dicey. We get to choose what food to eliminate for the other person. We know each other's favorites too. We'll add a new thing each month. We're going to save what we know is the hardest thing, for the last month. Her's is coffee. She's gonna die (well, I hope not literally, and I hope that my evil plan will actually help her be more healthy).
We're also putting a little bit of money aside, intended for the winner, but we're both so determined to win, that should we both make it to the end, we're going to have a sister get-away, using the money we've set aside.
I'll report each month on the new thing that was added to our list of no-no's, and hopefully by being accountable to you, I can be a winner. My sister is determined to "kick my butt" and she's already calling me "LOSER".
BRING IT ON!!!
We started today, Oct. 1st, with a resolve to not eat sugar for one year. We've got Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas to get through, but it's not like we'll NEVER get our favorite treats again EVER, and it's time to take action and not just talk about it.
I could never do this with any of my friends because we're too forgiving. If we slip up, we tell each other it's OK, that we deserved that treat. I need someone to push me. My sister is extremely competitive. She is strong and immovable when she has her mind made up. I never thought I was competitive myself, but when I'm with her and we play games, she wins more than I do and it really ticks me off. And then she gloats about it, which really riles me up. So, I knew she would be the one to do this challenge with.
I texted her this morning with my proposal. She jumped all over it, and said "I'm In...starting NOW" and she proceeded to throw away 1/2 a candybar she had in her desk at work. (I thought "crap...I've unleashed a monster!"
Throughout the day, we've come up with other ideas. This first month is no sugar, then on Nov. 1st, we have to add something to the list, and here's where it'll get dicey. We get to choose what food to eliminate for the other person. We know each other's favorites too. We'll add a new thing each month. We're going to save what we know is the hardest thing, for the last month. Her's is coffee. She's gonna die (well, I hope not literally, and I hope that my evil plan will actually help her be more healthy).
We're also putting a little bit of money aside, intended for the winner, but we're both so determined to win, that should we both make it to the end, we're going to have a sister get-away, using the money we've set aside.
I'll report each month on the new thing that was added to our list of no-no's, and hopefully by being accountable to you, I can be a winner. My sister is determined to "kick my butt" and she's already calling me "LOSER".
BRING IT ON!!!
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Middle Son
I was praising my son the other day to a few people who had inquired about him, and I realized later, that I don't voice my praise and love often enough to that son himself. So....
You are an AMAZING person, and it all started the day you were born. I will always remember when you were placed in my arms and you looked up at me with your big blue eyes, fully alert, trusting, and full of wonder. You did not cry. You were completely calm and content, yet observant, and at peace. Your quiet manner could be deceiving, but you soak things in and apply them to your life. This has continued to be your pattern throughout childhood, and now into adulthood.
You have been put into situations in your life when you have had to defend your beliefs, and you did so, without apology. You are kind and accepting of others, yet you are firm in your own beliefs and how you choose to live your life. You are an example to kids and adults alike.
You have learned and then shown great leadership skills with scouting opportunities. You have loved so many through these opportunities, and been able to be the teacher.
I have loved watching you explore music, and find a way to express yourself through song. You have an incredible talent with the guitar that blows me away and brings tears to my eyes everytime I hear you play. Your timidity used to confine you to your room, playing in private, but then with some encouragement, you have branched out in sharing with others. Music has been a great outlet for you to express joy as well as pain. Sometimes when you are in the privacy of your bedroom, bearing your soul, perhaps unaware that anyone else can hear you, I can. I do not want to intrude, yet as I listen, I catch a glimpse into how you are feeling at the moment. If it's sadness, I cry silently along with you. If it's happiness, I still cry, but with a smile. You have been blessed with a great gift, that I believe you will reach others with. Don't let it die.
I love how we can talk adult-to-adult now. I enjoy your presence, your gentle hugs, your humor, your laughter, your helpfulness, your compassion, and still...those big blue eyes.
You are no longer the baby looking up at me, but I look up at you (literally, cuz you're so tall), and I also look up TO you, as a man, yet still my child; an example; a wonder; a beautiful person; a teacher; a son of God.
I am so lucky to be your Mom
You are an AMAZING person, and it all started the day you were born. I will always remember when you were placed in my arms and you looked up at me with your big blue eyes, fully alert, trusting, and full of wonder. You did not cry. You were completely calm and content, yet observant, and at peace. Your quiet manner could be deceiving, but you soak things in and apply them to your life. This has continued to be your pattern throughout childhood, and now into adulthood.
You have been put into situations in your life when you have had to defend your beliefs, and you did so, without apology. You are kind and accepting of others, yet you are firm in your own beliefs and how you choose to live your life. You are an example to kids and adults alike.
You have learned and then shown great leadership skills with scouting opportunities. You have loved so many through these opportunities, and been able to be the teacher.
I have loved watching you explore music, and find a way to express yourself through song. You have an incredible talent with the guitar that blows me away and brings tears to my eyes everytime I hear you play. Your timidity used to confine you to your room, playing in private, but then with some encouragement, you have branched out in sharing with others. Music has been a great outlet for you to express joy as well as pain. Sometimes when you are in the privacy of your bedroom, bearing your soul, perhaps unaware that anyone else can hear you, I can. I do not want to intrude, yet as I listen, I catch a glimpse into how you are feeling at the moment. If it's sadness, I cry silently along with you. If it's happiness, I still cry, but with a smile. You have been blessed with a great gift, that I believe you will reach others with. Don't let it die.
I love how we can talk adult-to-adult now. I enjoy your presence, your gentle hugs, your humor, your laughter, your helpfulness, your compassion, and still...those big blue eyes.
You are no longer the baby looking up at me, but I look up at you (literally, cuz you're so tall), and I also look up TO you, as a man, yet still my child; an example; a wonder; a beautiful person; a teacher; a son of God.
I am so lucky to be your Mom
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Teacher Trouble
When my son comes home and tells me about a negative classroom experience, I always listen patiently, and then try to explain what angle the teacher might be coming from. I always emphasize: respect!
But sometimes certain situations get my blood boiling just a bit. For instance, my son came home and said that he went to class all happy, walked in and did a little dance step, spun around, and plopped down in his chair, while giggling with other classmates. The teacher's assistant (long-time teacher in this particular department), who was teaching that day, asked "what's your name?", so he told her, and she said "do you get your attitude from your older siblings?" He gave her a quizzical look, and asked if she knew "so-and-so", and she said "oh ya", and proceeded to lecture him on respect, and pointed out that he clearly enjoys calling attention to himself, and what the proper way to act is, etc., etc. He came home completely stunned. First of all, he LOVES this subject, does well in it, shows talent in it, had a teacher at the previous school who LOVED him, all other teachers report that he's a "great" kid and that they love him and his humor, etc., etc. Secondly, he'd been labeled because of older siblings. Third, she bawled him out in front of the class. Fourth-His previous teacher "fanned a flame" and his love for this subject became a full raging fire. I'm just afraid that a negative experience with a teacher who sends clear messages to the child that she does not like him, or his presence in her classroom, is going to squelch that fire that took so much work on my part and others', to "fan" in the first place.
Other kids have complained about this teacher before, but they perform for her because she scares them to death.
I emailed the head teacher, just to voice my concern; to nip-it-in-the-bud so that his whole year isn't miserable. I was very kind in my words, and her reply was kind, yet fully supportive of her assistant. I am not usually a whiner, or a ranting and raving parent, but come on, who sticks up for the child if their own parent won't? Teachers back each other up, the principal backs up the teacher, and it's the child that is always assumed to be the one at fault.
I don't agree, and I am angry.
Just for the record though, I am in awe of teachers and am so grateful to them for all they do for all of us who learn at their feet. There is just a definite distinction between those who have a passion for teaching, and for those they teach; and those who just do it for the paycheck. Sad!
But sometimes certain situations get my blood boiling just a bit. For instance, my son came home and said that he went to class all happy, walked in and did a little dance step, spun around, and plopped down in his chair, while giggling with other classmates. The teacher's assistant (long-time teacher in this particular department), who was teaching that day, asked "what's your name?", so he told her, and she said "do you get your attitude from your older siblings?" He gave her a quizzical look, and asked if she knew "so-and-so", and she said "oh ya", and proceeded to lecture him on respect, and pointed out that he clearly enjoys calling attention to himself, and what the proper way to act is, etc., etc. He came home completely stunned. First of all, he LOVES this subject, does well in it, shows talent in it, had a teacher at the previous school who LOVED him, all other teachers report that he's a "great" kid and that they love him and his humor, etc., etc. Secondly, he'd been labeled because of older siblings. Third, she bawled him out in front of the class. Fourth-His previous teacher "fanned a flame" and his love for this subject became a full raging fire. I'm just afraid that a negative experience with a teacher who sends clear messages to the child that she does not like him, or his presence in her classroom, is going to squelch that fire that took so much work on my part and others', to "fan" in the first place.
Other kids have complained about this teacher before, but they perform for her because she scares them to death.
I emailed the head teacher, just to voice my concern; to nip-it-in-the-bud so that his whole year isn't miserable. I was very kind in my words, and her reply was kind, yet fully supportive of her assistant. I am not usually a whiner, or a ranting and raving parent, but come on, who sticks up for the child if their own parent won't? Teachers back each other up, the principal backs up the teacher, and it's the child that is always assumed to be the one at fault.
I don't agree, and I am angry.
Just for the record though, I am in awe of teachers and am so grateful to them for all they do for all of us who learn at their feet. There is just a definite distinction between those who have a passion for teaching, and for those they teach; and those who just do it for the paycheck. Sad!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
In Love...AGAIN!
Sept. 20th was, and continues to be a magical day for me. I remember 30 years ago, the nervous yet excited bride I was, completely at peace with the choice I'd made in a husband. The beautiful Salt Lake temple, along with the people I love, were all I needed that day.
Over the years we have had our share of heartache and struggles, but we have weathered the storms and celebrated the rainbows in our life together.
My husband is the only one I can share the innermost feelings of my heart with, and know he will always love me, no matter what.
What I love about my husband is: his hugs; his humor; the way he takes care of our every need; the job he works hard at day after day even though it causes great stress; his honesty; the way he listens to me; the way he spoils me by doing things he knows I appreciate, even little things like cleaning the kitchen or washing my car (I've never had a "honey-do" list for my husband, he just does things); the way he honors his role as the Patriarch of our home and his role in our religious beliefs; the way he looks at me with adoration; the knack he has for fixing anything and everything; the way he teaches our boys how to be a man and how to treat a woman; the way he was able to shift gears from boys to a daughter and the tender way he treats our daughter (his Princess); the way he always asks what I want to do for our date night; the way he puts me first; his thoughtfulness in bringing me an alergy pill in the middle of the night when he notices I'm having a hard time, or covering me with an extra blanket when he knows I'm cold; the days he brings me flowers for no reason at all; the way he reaches for my hand, wanting me closeby; the way he loves me.
I enjoy being with him so much, that whenever we are able to get away, just the two of us, it's kinda hard to come back to real life and go our separate ways to work and other responsibilities, but how nice to know that we have a haven to return to with each other.
I am not only in love with this man, but I really, really LIKE him.
Over the years we have had our share of heartache and struggles, but we have weathered the storms and celebrated the rainbows in our life together.
My husband is the only one I can share the innermost feelings of my heart with, and know he will always love me, no matter what.
What I love about my husband is: his hugs; his humor; the way he takes care of our every need; the job he works hard at day after day even though it causes great stress; his honesty; the way he listens to me; the way he spoils me by doing things he knows I appreciate, even little things like cleaning the kitchen or washing my car (I've never had a "honey-do" list for my husband, he just does things); the way he honors his role as the Patriarch of our home and his role in our religious beliefs; the way he looks at me with adoration; the knack he has for fixing anything and everything; the way he teaches our boys how to be a man and how to treat a woman; the way he was able to shift gears from boys to a daughter and the tender way he treats our daughter (his Princess); the way he always asks what I want to do for our date night; the way he puts me first; his thoughtfulness in bringing me an alergy pill in the middle of the night when he notices I'm having a hard time, or covering me with an extra blanket when he knows I'm cold; the days he brings me flowers for no reason at all; the way he reaches for my hand, wanting me closeby; the way he loves me.
I enjoy being with him so much, that whenever we are able to get away, just the two of us, it's kinda hard to come back to real life and go our separate ways to work and other responsibilities, but how nice to know that we have a haven to return to with each other.
I am not only in love with this man, but I really, really LIKE him.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
The Capacity to Love
At the news of another grandson soon to join our family, I have thought about how the capacity to love keeps expanding throughout my life. I feel a deep love for someone who has not even been born yet. The birth of my own 7th child brought me as much joy and love as my first one did. The soon-to-be birth of a 3rd grandchild is as exciting as I anticipate the birth of our 36th to be. The heart has the ability to grow and love, and embrace another, and another, and another life and relationship.
I think of the hundreds, maybe even thousands of people who have crossed my path during my life; who have influenced my life for good; who have caused my heart to grow with love.
The sweetness of love is magnified when it is returned to you. Just this morning my daughter texted me, just to tell me that she thinks I'm the best Mom ever and that she hopes she will be as good of a Mom as I am someday. WOW! She made my day. It happened to come in a moment when I had just been thinking about ways I could be a better Mom. Her love in that short text came through loud and clear.
God has given me a glimpse of His love for ALL of us. I am filled with gratitude.
I think of the hundreds, maybe even thousands of people who have crossed my path during my life; who have influenced my life for good; who have caused my heart to grow with love.
The sweetness of love is magnified when it is returned to you. Just this morning my daughter texted me, just to tell me that she thinks I'm the best Mom ever and that she hopes she will be as good of a Mom as I am someday. WOW! She made my day. It happened to come in a moment when I had just been thinking about ways I could be a better Mom. Her love in that short text came through loud and clear.
God has given me a glimpse of His love for ALL of us. I am filled with gratitude.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Enduring
I have had a really busy, crazy week, and while I could've stayed home tonight to relax for a change, I chose instead to attend a get-together of women, to hear Mary Ellen Edmunds speak . She has been one of my favorites at Education Week in past years and I knew it would be an entertaining, uplifting night, and I wasn't disappointed.
She addressed the subject of enduring life. We're taught how to endure to the end, not the middle, but we've got to keep going to the end. In typical fashion, she sucked us in from the very beginning with her humor. She has a way of making me feel so comfortable that I forget I'm in a formal setting. Instead, I feel like I'm just sitting around chatting and laughing with the girls. She is very gifted at weaving in humor, stories and personal examples throughout her presentation, and while in one moment I'm laughing, the next I have a catch in my throat, as I realize the point she is trying to make, the lesson she is teaching us.
Tonight, the thing that stuck with me is: "HE knows exactly how you feel." Everyone, EVERYONE has trials (or will have) and none of us can say to another "I know exactly how you feel" because we don't. We may have some idea, and we can empathize, but we really don't know exactly how that person is feeling; but HE does.
I've heard this type of message before, have taught the concept myself in lessons I've given, but sometimes the way a certain person presents something, can hit you in a deeper way, as she did for me tonight. She told us to let HIM into our lives. Let HIM love us. We're not alone. HE knows exactly how we feel. Very powerful message.
Her brother-in-law broke his neck years ago (before he married her baby sister) and was paralyzed, although he had limited muscle activity in his upper left arm, and over time, learned how to work with water colors. He wanted to paint something for each family member and asked her what she would like a painting of. She wanted one of the Savior. She showed us a smaller print of his original artwork, his painting of Christ, and it was absolutely breathtaking. It captured all that she had talked about, imprinting in my mind and heart, that HE truly does know exactly how I feel.
We are never alone.
She addressed the subject of enduring life. We're taught how to endure to the end, not the middle, but we've got to keep going to the end. In typical fashion, she sucked us in from the very beginning with her humor. She has a way of making me feel so comfortable that I forget I'm in a formal setting. Instead, I feel like I'm just sitting around chatting and laughing with the girls. She is very gifted at weaving in humor, stories and personal examples throughout her presentation, and while in one moment I'm laughing, the next I have a catch in my throat, as I realize the point she is trying to make, the lesson she is teaching us.
Tonight, the thing that stuck with me is: "HE knows exactly how you feel." Everyone, EVERYONE has trials (or will have) and none of us can say to another "I know exactly how you feel" because we don't. We may have some idea, and we can empathize, but we really don't know exactly how that person is feeling; but HE does.
I've heard this type of message before, have taught the concept myself in lessons I've given, but sometimes the way a certain person presents something, can hit you in a deeper way, as she did for me tonight. She told us to let HIM into our lives. Let HIM love us. We're not alone. HE knows exactly how we feel. Very powerful message.
Her brother-in-law broke his neck years ago (before he married her baby sister) and was paralyzed, although he had limited muscle activity in his upper left arm, and over time, learned how to work with water colors. He wanted to paint something for each family member and asked her what she would like a painting of. She wanted one of the Savior. She showed us a smaller print of his original artwork, his painting of Christ, and it was absolutely breathtaking. It captured all that she had talked about, imprinting in my mind and heart, that HE truly does know exactly how I feel.
We are never alone.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
One person's influence
Terry's mission President, Marvin L. Pugh, died at the age of 98. He has said in the past that he didn't think anyone would come to his funeral. His only daughter preceeded him in death when she was killed at the age of 21, in a car accident. His wife, the love of his life, passed away earlier this year. Pres. Pugh said he has no posterity, so who would come? He was wrong. He was the father figure to over 350 missionaries 30+ years ago, and they all have children and grandchildren, and ALL our lives have been influenced greatly by this magnificent man. Pages and pages were printed up with all the names of his "posterity", which was included as an insert with the program.
Terry, along with 3 other missionaries, who were called the Mormonaires on their mission as they sang together in a LIVE theatre for many months and the experience was a mission tool, had the privilege of singing Oh Danny Boy (Pres. Pugh's favorite song), with the 2nd verse written by the group (mostly Nick Mills) personalizing it to Pres. Pugh, beginning with "Oh Man of God". The guys made up the parts themselves. They sing acapella, in real tight harmony, and it was the most gorgeous thing I've ever heard. The only advice I gave them is that this wasn't to be a "performance", but a sweet tribute to Pres. Pugh. It was not to impress the congregation. The spirit carried the message beautifully.
The chapel, overflow, and cultural hall was full. Many were missionaries, some traveling long distances to be there today to honor this great man. Pres. Monson himself, came to the viewing last night, expressing what a great man Pres. Pugh was and how he had extended all of his callings to him. Unfortunately, we weren't at the viewing, (the guys were rehearsing at another location), so didn't get to see Pres. Monson, but still so cool!!
Pres. Pugh was an unassuming, humble, caring, loving man. He was a teacher. The way he taught was by example. Just by knowing him, and talking to him, made a person want to be better. He KNEW and loved the Savior.
Terry and I were married in the SLC temple Sept. 20, 1980, and Pres. Pugh performed the ceremony. He and his wife offered their home to me and my family in the days preceeding the wedding. I still remember the love extended to us, the feeling in their home, and the words spoken in the temple at our wedding, and since.
Today I have reflected on all that I've learned from this man and I think the best way to honor him, is to go forward in life, putting into practice what he has taught.
He will never be forgotten.
Terry, along with 3 other missionaries, who were called the Mormonaires on their mission as they sang together in a LIVE theatre for many months and the experience was a mission tool, had the privilege of singing Oh Danny Boy (Pres. Pugh's favorite song), with the 2nd verse written by the group (mostly Nick Mills) personalizing it to Pres. Pugh, beginning with "Oh Man of God". The guys made up the parts themselves. They sing acapella, in real tight harmony, and it was the most gorgeous thing I've ever heard. The only advice I gave them is that this wasn't to be a "performance", but a sweet tribute to Pres. Pugh. It was not to impress the congregation. The spirit carried the message beautifully.
The chapel, overflow, and cultural hall was full. Many were missionaries, some traveling long distances to be there today to honor this great man. Pres. Monson himself, came to the viewing last night, expressing what a great man Pres. Pugh was and how he had extended all of his callings to him. Unfortunately, we weren't at the viewing, (the guys were rehearsing at another location), so didn't get to see Pres. Monson, but still so cool!!
Pres. Pugh was an unassuming, humble, caring, loving man. He was a teacher. The way he taught was by example. Just by knowing him, and talking to him, made a person want to be better. He KNEW and loved the Savior.
Terry and I were married in the SLC temple Sept. 20, 1980, and Pres. Pugh performed the ceremony. He and his wife offered their home to me and my family in the days preceeding the wedding. I still remember the love extended to us, the feeling in their home, and the words spoken in the temple at our wedding, and since.
Today I have reflected on all that I've learned from this man and I think the best way to honor him, is to go forward in life, putting into practice what he has taught.
He will never be forgotten.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Magic
Sometimes life and my current responsibilities tend to weigh me down. This past weekend was a particularly difficult one for me and I allowed myself to sink into despair, and maybe even a bit of self-pity. I wondered how I would ever pull myself out, but I didn't have to. Others did it for me. Today, while sitting at my desk engrossed in my typing, a little voice said "HI g-MA" and I look at the doorway to my office to see the sweetest little granddaughter's face, lit up with a smile that would melt anyone's heart, let alone mine. All the gloom immediately left me, as that little girl RAN over to me and jumped up into my lap. I have been feeling much better ever since. It's magic!
To make my day even better, one of my sons put away the dishes from the dishwasher...get this...are you ready?...WITHOUT BEING ASKED!!! Magic!
To complete my day, my daughter-in-law made cookies for me to take to our neighborhood potluck tonight, bailing me out of having to scramble and make something last minute after getting home from work. AND...she also asked if she could make dinner for us tomorrow night. Umm, didn't take me long to say "yes please". Magic!
All the things that have been hanging over my head like a thick fog, pressing down on me, weighing me down like a ton of bricks, have all receded today with these three simple things that took place in my normal routine of a day. It doesn't take much, and yet it's HUGE and means the world to me.
Magic!
To make my day even better, one of my sons put away the dishes from the dishwasher...get this...are you ready?...WITHOUT BEING ASKED!!! Magic!
To complete my day, my daughter-in-law made cookies for me to take to our neighborhood potluck tonight, bailing me out of having to scramble and make something last minute after getting home from work. AND...she also asked if she could make dinner for us tomorrow night. Umm, didn't take me long to say "yes please". Magic!
All the things that have been hanging over my head like a thick fog, pressing down on me, weighing me down like a ton of bricks, have all receded today with these three simple things that took place in my normal routine of a day. It doesn't take much, and yet it's HUGE and means the world to me.
Magic!
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Baby no more!
My last-born turned 15 today. I remember the pregnancy vividly. Morning sickness that lasted the entire 9 months, AND was NOT restricted to just mornings. I had 5 other children to care for. I was exhausted all the time. I had pains I never had with the others. BUt it was all worth it. I had hoped for another girl so my one daughter would have a sister, but not knowing ahead of time, the sex of the baby, when he was born I felt an instant bond and love for him that is indescribable. Even though I had had 6 babies before this one, the feeling of love and tenderness and protectiveness was just as strong as it was with baby #1.
Now I look at this baby of mine who has grown several inches this past year, has lost his cute baby cheeks and young boy look, is turning into a young man who will soon be driving and next year, dating, has discovered talents he possesses, has found his niche in life and in the family, is a hard worker and does so much for others, even taking care of ME in many ways. He has become the nurturer.
I love being a Mom!
Now I look at this baby of mine who has grown several inches this past year, has lost his cute baby cheeks and young boy look, is turning into a young man who will soon be driving and next year, dating, has discovered talents he possesses, has found his niche in life and in the family, is a hard worker and does so much for others, even taking care of ME in many ways. He has become the nurturer.
I love being a Mom!
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Music fills my soul
I went to a violin/piano recital tonight to support my friend of 32 years. Janice Vincent and Robert Nakea played 3 Sonatas, the work of Edvard Hagerup Grieg. The music itself, captivated me from the first note, and then witnessing the passion that both Janice and Robert exibit, I felt as though I had been transported to another time and place. Music does that to me. It affects my very soul and I experience a kind of out-of-body experience. The only way my body knows how to respond, is through tears.
I am so grateful for the talents of others; for the countless hours of practice, over numerous years, to perfect the talents they have been blessed with, in order to share with everyone else, for the building up and edifying of our lives.
I left my busy home tonight, with the purpose of doing something for my friend, by showing support, yet also knowing that I would be the one to benefit the most. I am filled.
I am so grateful for the talents of others; for the countless hours of practice, over numerous years, to perfect the talents they have been blessed with, in order to share with everyone else, for the building up and edifying of our lives.
I left my busy home tonight, with the purpose of doing something for my friend, by showing support, yet also knowing that I would be the one to benefit the most. I am filled.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Tremor
I've made remards in the recent past that I embrace life and the age I am currently sitting at. I still embrace life, but honestly, I do all I can to defy my true age.
I exercise faithfully and am on a diet plan to try to retain as much youth as possible and feel better. I color my hair to look younger, but have been doing it for so long, that I thought maybe I ought to go back to my natural color. I asked my hair stylist how much gray I would have if I did that, and she said "honey...you're ALL gray". SO...I won't be going there anytime soon. I get my nails done, which is another splurge that makes me feel good, younger in a way. I go to the Dr. every year to go through all the required testing to make sure I stay on top of my health.
Now a new problem crops up. I have a head tremor. I have had it for years, but just when applying makeup. Now, just in the last 2 weeks, it has become very pronounced, especially when I text, type, or write. That's when it's worst, but it also happens for not reason at all; putting toast in the toaster, looking at someone while talking to each other, any time really. I can't control it. It's not a nervous thing, but is completely out of my control, which is very unnerving. My kids are noticing and commenting on it, which has been more alarming to me.
In research we've done on our own, it is not a Parkinson's symptom (that begins with hands and feet), but most likely a neurological brain deterioration of some kind. There is no cure, although medication can help when it gets really bad. I do need to go see a Dr. though and get properly diagonosed.
I have been thinking to myself, "GREAT!!! There's no mistake NOW that you're an old woman." My son Jason said, "Mom, if it bothers you that much, just wear headphones and when someone asks you why your head is shaking, just pull out an earpiece and say you're just rocking out to your music" (as head shakes back and forth). I'll be the rockin-out Gma. OK, I can live with that.
I exercise faithfully and am on a diet plan to try to retain as much youth as possible and feel better. I color my hair to look younger, but have been doing it for so long, that I thought maybe I ought to go back to my natural color. I asked my hair stylist how much gray I would have if I did that, and she said "honey...you're ALL gray". SO...I won't be going there anytime soon. I get my nails done, which is another splurge that makes me feel good, younger in a way. I go to the Dr. every year to go through all the required testing to make sure I stay on top of my health.
Now a new problem crops up. I have a head tremor. I have had it for years, but just when applying makeup. Now, just in the last 2 weeks, it has become very pronounced, especially when I text, type, or write. That's when it's worst, but it also happens for not reason at all; putting toast in the toaster, looking at someone while talking to each other, any time really. I can't control it. It's not a nervous thing, but is completely out of my control, which is very unnerving. My kids are noticing and commenting on it, which has been more alarming to me.
In research we've done on our own, it is not a Parkinson's symptom (that begins with hands and feet), but most likely a neurological brain deterioration of some kind. There is no cure, although medication can help when it gets really bad. I do need to go see a Dr. though and get properly diagonosed.
I have been thinking to myself, "GREAT!!! There's no mistake NOW that you're an old woman." My son Jason said, "Mom, if it bothers you that much, just wear headphones and when someone asks you why your head is shaking, just pull out an earpiece and say you're just rocking out to your music" (as head shakes back and forth). I'll be the rockin-out Gma. OK, I can live with that.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Monday Night Sacred Time
Monday night has been set aside for family time. Whether we choose to talk about a certain subject, do some reading together, or watch a movie together, that's our time. The phone continues to ring, the doorbell sounds off, interruptions still occur. The week is so busy with so many things, and then the weekend is busy with other certain things, including church commitments on Sunday, that we expect the phones to ring and interruptions to happen, but is it too much to ask for some peace and quiet and privacy on just one night a week? I get annoyed when those who know better, continue to infringe on our rare time together. I realize that sometimes it's necessary, I'm sure I've done it myself, but I sure think twice, and usually wait for another time. On Mon. nights I do not feel guilty if I don't answer the phone. But sometimes that doesn't help, because the person then just walks over to the house and rings the bell. Sheesh! Am I whining here? Maybe so. After a long, exhausting day, I just wanna be left alone for a minute ya know?
Better go to bed. :)
Better go to bed. :)
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Grocery Shopping
I LOVE a full pantry and refrigerator. Once a month, we get to do a larger grocery shopping spree than the rest of the month. I love making out a menu, making out a grocery list for several stores, including Sam's Club (love to shop there); I love the shopping itself; husband coming with me; we grab a bit to eat and make a day of it. I even love the preparation that needs to happen before shopping; cleaning out the fridge, pantry, washing everything out, reorganizing. Then to come home with the groceries and restock our kitchen, just leaves us all feeling rather rich. It'll be tight to get the rest of the bills paid, but seeing full cupboards is a very satisfying feeling.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Hailey
I got to spend some wonderful one-on-one time with my 21 month old granddaughter, Hailey, last night and this morning. She was here til bedtime, then she and I drove to her house in Eagle Mountain so she could sleep in her own bed, then back this direction this morning to drop her off at Breanne's so I could go to work.
That little girl was so happy and jabbered the entire time. It wouldn't have surprised me, had she continued talking in her sleep. We talked, sang songs, read stories, cuddled, and shared kisses.
You do not tend grandchildren, expecting to have a relaxing time. You don't get "breaks", including potty breaks. She reminded me of my own children following me EVERYWHERE! When it's your grandchild...it is NEVER annoying. Every moment is precious time.
During our 40 min. drive back this direction today, she said to me "sing it Gma", so not knowing what song she had in her head, I started singing The Wheels On The Bus Go Round And Round, and she started giggling hysterically. I didn't know if I was singing off-key, or had the words wrong, or the verses mixed up or what, but she couldn't stop giggling, then like shutting off a faucet, sobered and proceeded to sing a solo of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, then I Am A Child Of God, then the ABCs. That was the most enjoyable trip I've taken in a long time, and ya know what song is stuck in my head now, thinking of this sweet little girl? You Are My Sunshine!
That little girl was so happy and jabbered the entire time. It wouldn't have surprised me, had she continued talking in her sleep. We talked, sang songs, read stories, cuddled, and shared kisses.
You do not tend grandchildren, expecting to have a relaxing time. You don't get "breaks", including potty breaks. She reminded me of my own children following me EVERYWHERE! When it's your grandchild...it is NEVER annoying. Every moment is precious time.
During our 40 min. drive back this direction today, she said to me "sing it Gma", so not knowing what song she had in her head, I started singing The Wheels On The Bus Go Round And Round, and she started giggling hysterically. I didn't know if I was singing off-key, or had the words wrong, or the verses mixed up or what, but she couldn't stop giggling, then like shutting off a faucet, sobered and proceeded to sing a solo of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, then I Am A Child Of God, then the ABCs. That was the most enjoyable trip I've taken in a long time, and ya know what song is stuck in my head now, thinking of this sweet little girl? You Are My Sunshine!
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Defending my beliefs, with love.
In preparation for a lesson I will be teaching next week, I asked my sister what it was that led to her rejecting the religious beliefs we had grown up with. In recent visits, we have avoided the subject of religion, not wanting to offend the other. But tonight the walls came down and we both shared our innermost thoughts, while expressing love for each other. While I was able to understand how she felt, I also understood on a new level why I believe the way I do and I wanted to share that with her. In the sharing, I strengthened my own beliefs as I told her of some personal experiences of my own that let me know without a doubt, that what I believe is true. I will never deny my faith. I would never want to force what I have on someone else, but rather I want to share. The happiness I have in my life, is not just for a select few, but is meant for all to enjoy. While she may not agree with me, I love my sister, and will continue to love her for who she is.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Colonoscopy
Ever since Katie Couric became a spokesperson for prevention of colon cancer by getting a routine colonoscopy, I knew when I turned 50 that it was something I just had to do. The "prep" for the procedure isn't as bad as some have said. The trick is to get the lemon flavored magnesium citrate, NOT cherry or grape. (The nurse gave me that tip.) AND, chill it first. It's fizzy like soda pop and tastes like a generic brand of soda, only pretty strong. I did fine with the first dose. The 2nd dose was a little harder to get down, but it was OK. It did upset my stomach and I found that rather than needing to be CLOSE BY a toilet, I needed to pretty much stay put ON the toilet.
I did sleep from about 2:30 am to 5:15 am. Got to the hospital by 6:00, but had to "empty" again. I was so worried I wasn't cleaned out enough, even though I should've been. I didn't want them to send me home, saying I needed to try again another time. I was also worried about being covered up properly. When it was my turn, I was told to roll to my left side. I was adjusting my gown and blanket so as to cover myself completely and wrap it all around me like a mummy. I'm sure the nurses were laughing inside themselves, knowing in about 2 min. they'd be undoing what I had just so carefully done. My nerves had also caused my blood pressure to rise quite high. But they quickly gave me the medicine to make me sleepy. They also give you a "forgetful" drug. What the heck do they do to you that you have to forget? Isn't the drug that puts you to sleep enough? I don't get it. But I won't complain. I guess I don't want to remember anything. I was watching the monitor, wondering how long it would be before I became drowsy and next thing I knew, I was waking up with Terry beside me. I was done.
It only took 15 min. and we were home 2 1/2 hours after arriving. The Dr. pronounced me clean, no problems, and I don't have to repeat that procedure for another 10 years.
I think it's so important to do what we can to take care of our bodies. I for one, would like to be on this earth, enjoying my family and friends, for as long as possible, and I will do all within my power, to make that happen.
I did allow myself to indulge in some "cheat" food tonight, which I haven't allowed in a while, but the pizza didn't taste nearly as good as I had anticipated. Kinda made me sick. Back to my healthier choices tomorrow. I feel so much better eating that way. I must add though, that the chocolate I allowed myself tonight tasted WONDERFUL! THAT won't ever change.
I did sleep from about 2:30 am to 5:15 am. Got to the hospital by 6:00, but had to "empty" again. I was so worried I wasn't cleaned out enough, even though I should've been. I didn't want them to send me home, saying I needed to try again another time. I was also worried about being covered up properly. When it was my turn, I was told to roll to my left side. I was adjusting my gown and blanket so as to cover myself completely and wrap it all around me like a mummy. I'm sure the nurses were laughing inside themselves, knowing in about 2 min. they'd be undoing what I had just so carefully done. My nerves had also caused my blood pressure to rise quite high. But they quickly gave me the medicine to make me sleepy. They also give you a "forgetful" drug. What the heck do they do to you that you have to forget? Isn't the drug that puts you to sleep enough? I don't get it. But I won't complain. I guess I don't want to remember anything. I was watching the monitor, wondering how long it would be before I became drowsy and next thing I knew, I was waking up with Terry beside me. I was done.
It only took 15 min. and we were home 2 1/2 hours after arriving. The Dr. pronounced me clean, no problems, and I don't have to repeat that procedure for another 10 years.
I think it's so important to do what we can to take care of our bodies. I for one, would like to be on this earth, enjoying my family and friends, for as long as possible, and I will do all within my power, to make that happen.
I did allow myself to indulge in some "cheat" food tonight, which I haven't allowed in a while, but the pizza didn't taste nearly as good as I had anticipated. Kinda made me sick. Back to my healthier choices tomorrow. I feel so much better eating that way. I must add though, that the chocolate I allowed myself tonight tasted WONDERFUL! THAT won't ever change.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Tarzan
So, I went to the Tuacan in St. George with my friend Michelle, and we saw Tarzan. I LOVE the productions at that theatre. The setting itself is awe inspiring. It's amazing what they accomplish on stage and above our heads. In this case, flying monkeys, AND Tarzan himself!
The actors were all incredible, with amazing singing voices and great acting. It was not cheesy at all, just really wonderful.
Then there's Tarzan, in a class all by himself. Every muscle on his body was rippling. His legs were massive in muslces. I could not keep my eyes off of them. His biceps also captured my eye, and the way he was able to pick up Jane with such ease. I was really appreciative of the human body. I have never seen so many muscles prominent on one person at one time. Our bodies are amazing things and are made to be able to DO so many things.
OK, so yes I was drooling. Why is it OK for men to appreciate women but if a woman expresses appreciation about men, it's considered "sick"! Then I read the bio of Mr. Tarzan and he's a young kid with a baby boy of his own. And I'm drooling over him? He's young enough to be my son. SICK!!
The actors were all incredible, with amazing singing voices and great acting. It was not cheesy at all, just really wonderful.
Then there's Tarzan, in a class all by himself. Every muscle on his body was rippling. His legs were massive in muslces. I could not keep my eyes off of them. His biceps also captured my eye, and the way he was able to pick up Jane with such ease. I was really appreciative of the human body. I have never seen so many muscles prominent on one person at one time. Our bodies are amazing things and are made to be able to DO so many things.
OK, so yes I was drooling. Why is it OK for men to appreciate women but if a woman expresses appreciation about men, it's considered "sick"! Then I read the bio of Mr. Tarzan and he's a young kid with a baby boy of his own. And I'm drooling over him? He's young enough to be my son. SICK!!
Monday, July 5, 2010
Painting
Painting a room does not erase the memories. My daughter left when she married 7 months ago, but I had yet to touch her room until it became necessary. We now need the room for someone else, so we started by painting it. I could not bear to take down a poster she had hung on her ceiling a few years ago. I told Terry to leave the poster there. I need that one reminder to stay there. That one little thing brings back all kinds of memories. My little girl is a woman now, but she's still my girl and I love her so very much.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Endorphines
Endorphines are a wonderful thing. When I'm sad, lonely, depressed, mildly feeling blue for no reason, or angry that I can't have my chocolate :), there are two cures that work every time. Exercise and grandchildren.
I don't always enjoy the actual process of exercising, but I do look forward to it and HAVE to do it. It's like a drug for me. I know how I'll feel when I'm done so I absolutely can not miss it. I feel better immediately upon completion of a good workout, or even just a walk with a friend. It is SO therapeutic. There is just a rush of good feelings. I feel happy and am ready to continue on with whatever the day will bring.
Then there's my grandchildren. All it takes is for them to walk in the room and my face lights up, my insides feel like they're going to jump out of my skin. My heart is so full of love for these two babies (who are now almost 20 months and almost 14 months old) that I feel as though I've been lifted to another sphere. It's the most incredible thing. I am butter in their hands. I would do anything for them, and yes I spoil them rotten. They get whatever they want, but is there such a thing as too much love and attention? I don't think so.
I know I always talk about my grandchildren and not my children, but of course I love my children. Without them, I would have no grandchildren. :)
Oh, and we now have a 3rd one on the way. Jason and Laura are expecting baby #2. Could my smile get any bigger?
I don't always enjoy the actual process of exercising, but I do look forward to it and HAVE to do it. It's like a drug for me. I know how I'll feel when I'm done so I absolutely can not miss it. I feel better immediately upon completion of a good workout, or even just a walk with a friend. It is SO therapeutic. There is just a rush of good feelings. I feel happy and am ready to continue on with whatever the day will bring.
Then there's my grandchildren. All it takes is for them to walk in the room and my face lights up, my insides feel like they're going to jump out of my skin. My heart is so full of love for these two babies (who are now almost 20 months and almost 14 months old) that I feel as though I've been lifted to another sphere. It's the most incredible thing. I am butter in their hands. I would do anything for them, and yes I spoil them rotten. They get whatever they want, but is there such a thing as too much love and attention? I don't think so.
I know I always talk about my grandchildren and not my children, but of course I love my children. Without them, I would have no grandchildren. :)
Oh, and we now have a 3rd one on the way. Jason and Laura are expecting baby #2. Could my smile get any bigger?
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Change
Our Bishopric was changed today after 5 + years. While I knew it would likely happen soon, I still felt as though I had been hit in the gut when told "soon" would be today. My emotions burst forth without warning.
I spent a full day yesterday reflecting on the past two years of my own service as Relief Society president. My association with Bishop Burton has been a great learning experience for me. My eyes were opened much wider as to the things a Bishop must deal with. There is SO MUCH that is demanded of him, and yet he seemed to shoulder it all with ease, although I know it wasn't easy.
I have watched this man evolve over these past 5 years from a capable, educated man to a loving, generous, strong, patient, kind-hearted, spiritual giant. I learned things from him that helped me in my own calling and responsibilities. We have worked side by side on numerous welfare issues and had fallen into a groove, understanding each other and working well together. That was now to come to an immediate halt.
I am just full of gratitude for the lessons he taught me, for the genuine love he gave to all, for the Christlike way in which he ministered to his ward members.
I know callings are only for a time, and I'm grateful for the time I had to serve when and with whom I did. I now have the opportunity to serve with another, and perhaps learn other lessons I have not yet mastered.
I am not worshipping man, but rather expressing my gratitude for recognizing how God can work THROUGH man.
I spent a full day yesterday reflecting on the past two years of my own service as Relief Society president. My association with Bishop Burton has been a great learning experience for me. My eyes were opened much wider as to the things a Bishop must deal with. There is SO MUCH that is demanded of him, and yet he seemed to shoulder it all with ease, although I know it wasn't easy.
I have watched this man evolve over these past 5 years from a capable, educated man to a loving, generous, strong, patient, kind-hearted, spiritual giant. I learned things from him that helped me in my own calling and responsibilities. We have worked side by side on numerous welfare issues and had fallen into a groove, understanding each other and working well together. That was now to come to an immediate halt.
I am just full of gratitude for the lessons he taught me, for the genuine love he gave to all, for the Christlike way in which he ministered to his ward members.
I know callings are only for a time, and I'm grateful for the time I had to serve when and with whom I did. I now have the opportunity to serve with another, and perhaps learn other lessons I have not yet mastered.
I am not worshipping man, but rather expressing my gratitude for recognizing how God can work THROUGH man.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Sister get-away
I have recently returned from a wonderful vacation; sister time in WA. I only have one sister and we are very close. We talk the same, laugh the same, think the same (for the most part), like the same things; so anything we choose to do is a winner. We LOVE the ocean and we LOVE seafood. We enjoyed both on our two days at Ocean Shores. As you can see, we had beautiful weather, although the water was a little cold, but we always have to run in the water and let the waves chase us back. We thought it would be fun to feed the seagulls, but then got pretty freaked out by the way they swarmed us. We find ourselves squealing and diving for safety inside the car. Remember that movie The Birds? Still freaks me out.
We shopped at the gift shops where I found a new pair of sweats and sweatshirt, to replace the ratty ones that I've worn to death, which I bought there years ago. My purple sweatshirt is literally falling apart, so I was excited to finally replace it, but do you think I could throw that old one away? Nope! Still wearin it.
I hunted for my favorite vanilla perfume I bought there many years ago. I've looked around here at every store I walk into, looked online, but have been unsuccessful in finding my favorite. I found the same gift shop I remember buying it at the first time, but they didn't have it anymore. However, I found a comparable replacement. I'm SO happy. I'm not into the strong floral scents, but love the subtle food scents, especially vanilla.
My sister Cheryl and I talked a mile a minute for 5 days straight. We couldn't get enough of each other. We did take breaks to read our books or watch a movie, talking every so often. Cheryl had prepared my very own suite upstairs in her house, which not only had a TV, but a couch, a loveseat by the bed with a reading light, and also a goodie basket on the coffee table, complete with all the things I love: Fritos (my #1 favorite chip snack, a must-have daily), chocolate (of course, another must-have), gum (always chewing it), memo pad, candy, Kleenex, chap stick and lip gloss. She's the best hostess ever.
Cheryl's husband of two years is an awesome guy who adores my sister, so I love him all the more. He took us out to dinner, made morning runs for their lattes, always getting me a hot chocolate with almond flavoring (yum), would shut himself in the bedroom when he sensed we needed some alone time, and was just a gem.
I was able to sneek in a visit with my brother one day too.
It was the most relaxing, enjoyable vacation ever. I only had myself to worry about. Should I feel guilty about that? I can't tell you how many people questioned me about going on a vacation by myself, surprised that I would do it. What's wrong with that? It felt good.
It's always nice to get home though, especially to my own bed. But I must admit, that after only being home for 2 days, I can't help but dream and start planning our next sister get-away.
Monday, May 17, 2010
I am a sponge.
The phone rings; CONSTANTLY. I find myself cringing, yet politely answering, and then try to meet each request that's made of me. Even though I'm better at delegating, the weight I feel can not be passed on. I feel like a sponge, trying to absorb everything that comes my way and offer everything of myself that I can, like I'm supposed to, but I admit, I don't always like it. This sponge is in need of a good wringing out and some airing out/drying time. I think my upcoming trip to WA to see my sister is very timely and will be just what I need. I'm not asking for sympathy here, just a place to write down my feelings and thoughts. That's therapy in itself.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Energy Source
Some people have to have their coffee, diet Cokes, or ingest some other form of an energy source in order to get motivated and moving for the day. Today for me, it was the neighborhood noises that I welcomed this morning: birds chirpping, lawn mowers running, neighbors chatting with each other, children playing, sprinkler systems being checked out, etc. The sunshine brought everyone out of hibernation today and I loved it. I felt a burst of energy that lasted the entire day. With windows open so I could feel a nice breeze and hear all the neighborhood sounds, I scurried through the house, cleaning anything and everything. It felt great and was very rejuvenating. Sunshine, people, and hard work, made for a happy day today.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Temple time
Great night at the temple tonight, especially at the end of the evening as I watched people I didn't know personally, greet each other with love and affection. I thought of my own family; immediate and extended; then of friends and others who mean so much to me in my life, and I just had such a warm, wonderful feeling. We have been blessed in so many ways and we've been given wonderful people in our lives who touch us for good and just make whatever dark days we may have, a lot brighter.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Mothering
My thoughts are turned today to my grandmothers and my mother and all the "mothering" I received from them which has shaped my life and who I am. My great-grandma Tess holds a special place in my heart because even in her very old age, she would welcome me into her home and she ALWAYS had cantalope on hand. She would cut it in half, scoop out the innards, and fill it with vanilla ice cream. She'd have one half and give me the other. It was a special treat that to this day, I always think of whenever I slice open a cantalope. It wasn't about the food though, it was that with great effort (and what to a younger person would be a simple task), she would do this for ME. She made me feel important and special. As we ate our treat, she would talk to me and listen.
I think of my Gma Jones who would wait at her living room window in great anticipation of our arrival, with a look of pure, childlike joy, when we pulled up into her driveway. She would break out into a huge open-mouthed grin, wave, and run to open the front door so she could greet each one of us with a kiss on the mouth and a tight squeeze. After we were all in the door, she would sit on the floor with us kids and talk to US, play with us, letting the grownups visit with each other. She would open up her refrigerator, which would be full of soda pop and let us choose. She would get out her fancy glasses and ice for us to pour our soda into. She would have candies and goodies. She always made our favorite food, knowing what each of our favorites were. I spent a week each summer with her (each child got their turn) and she treated me like an honored guest my entire visit. We sewed, we cooked, we went to the ocean where she rolled up her pant legs with me and ran with me into the waves, only to turn around and run AWAY from the waves as they threatened to mow us over, both of us squealing in delight. We picked cheeries from her tree each year as a family. Gma was there for me at momentous occasions and some tough times. She is my soul sister. At her passing, I inherited her wedding ring, which I cherish with all my heart.
My Gma Hunt was one of the most Christlike people I've ever known. Gpa was antagonistic towards our religion of choice, yet Gma made sure her children had the opportunities she had discovered. She was the most giving, loving human being, who gave service to anyone and everyone that she could. She did not have an easy life, yet pressed forward with faith, humor, and grace.
My mother: I can not sum up in words, what she has done for me and meant to me. I grew up with so much love from her that no matter what life threw at me, I had the knowledge that I was loved and I always had a safe place to go. I saw my Mom work hard. She found ways to help my Dad make ends meet. She took children into our home to babysit, which helped us financially and also allowed her to stay home with me and my siblings. She kept the home clean and orderly and always cooked us a hot meal. When Dad died, she was only 36 years old, with 4 children. That's when I realized how strong my mother is. While she surely grieved, she held our family together. She had to seek employment outside the home, which I'm sure broke her heart, yet even though she was absent in body more of the time, we still knew she was "there" for us. She sought help from other relatives and men to teach my brothers what they might miss from having a father in the home. She lived a steady, obedient life, never missing a beat in her religious convictions; never wavering in her faith that there is a God; one who loves us and carries us through the challenges we face in our lives. My Mom is a ROCK!
As I have now had my own children, and grandchildren, my heart has grown so big it can not contain all the love and joy I feel. Thanks to all the mothering I received and continue to receive, I can give a piece of my own heart to others.
I think of my Gma Jones who would wait at her living room window in great anticipation of our arrival, with a look of pure, childlike joy, when we pulled up into her driveway. She would break out into a huge open-mouthed grin, wave, and run to open the front door so she could greet each one of us with a kiss on the mouth and a tight squeeze. After we were all in the door, she would sit on the floor with us kids and talk to US, play with us, letting the grownups visit with each other. She would open up her refrigerator, which would be full of soda pop and let us choose. She would get out her fancy glasses and ice for us to pour our soda into. She would have candies and goodies. She always made our favorite food, knowing what each of our favorites were. I spent a week each summer with her (each child got their turn) and she treated me like an honored guest my entire visit. We sewed, we cooked, we went to the ocean where she rolled up her pant legs with me and ran with me into the waves, only to turn around and run AWAY from the waves as they threatened to mow us over, both of us squealing in delight. We picked cheeries from her tree each year as a family. Gma was there for me at momentous occasions and some tough times. She is my soul sister. At her passing, I inherited her wedding ring, which I cherish with all my heart.
My Gma Hunt was one of the most Christlike people I've ever known. Gpa was antagonistic towards our religion of choice, yet Gma made sure her children had the opportunities she had discovered. She was the most giving, loving human being, who gave service to anyone and everyone that she could. She did not have an easy life, yet pressed forward with faith, humor, and grace.
My mother: I can not sum up in words, what she has done for me and meant to me. I grew up with so much love from her that no matter what life threw at me, I had the knowledge that I was loved and I always had a safe place to go. I saw my Mom work hard. She found ways to help my Dad make ends meet. She took children into our home to babysit, which helped us financially and also allowed her to stay home with me and my siblings. She kept the home clean and orderly and always cooked us a hot meal. When Dad died, she was only 36 years old, with 4 children. That's when I realized how strong my mother is. While she surely grieved, she held our family together. She had to seek employment outside the home, which I'm sure broke her heart, yet even though she was absent in body more of the time, we still knew she was "there" for us. She sought help from other relatives and men to teach my brothers what they might miss from having a father in the home. She lived a steady, obedient life, never missing a beat in her religious convictions; never wavering in her faith that there is a God; one who loves us and carries us through the challenges we face in our lives. My Mom is a ROCK!
As I have now had my own children, and grandchildren, my heart has grown so big it can not contain all the love and joy I feel. Thanks to all the mothering I received and continue to receive, I can give a piece of my own heart to others.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
If I only had one day left to live...
I just read an interesting article tonight. A study was done where the question was asked: "What would you do with your time if you only had one year to live". Answers included travel, lots of travel, not staying home much, but going out and DOING; eating whatever the heart desired and eating mass quantities; purchasing things, no more "workouts", etc. The same question was asked giving you only 6 months to live and answers remained quite similar; mostly travel and indulging in food and material things. Then the question was asked giving you one DAY to live. Answers changed dramatically. Family became the focus; expressing love; giving hugs; talking and listening. THINGS did not matter anymore. I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I admit that there are THINGS that I truly do enjoy, but what's absolutely most important to me is my family and those I love. Do THEY know I feel this way?
Friday, April 30, 2010
Reconnecting with great friends
23 years ago we lived in Provo and while there for only 3 years, we developed a wonderful, close relationship with people who have become what I call forever friends. Shauna and I got to know each other while assigned to work with and teach the young women at church. We had an instant connection; a comfortableness with each other that was so unique, we felt as though we could be sisters. During those short 3 years, she and I shared everything together, from our joys to our fears to our heartaches, to our successes. We laughed together and dried each other's tears and wiped each other's mouths when sick. We were joined at the hip. Eventually we moved to Springville and they moved to Delta. We found ways to "feed" our relationship and keep it alive. I would drive to Delta and spend a day, or she would come here, or we'd meet in Nephi, telling our husbands we would be meeting for lunch, visit for a couple hours, and be home by dinner time; but that never happened. We'd meet at a park and talk until the sun went down, but we didn't notice until we became cold. Then we'd go grab a bite to eat and continue talking, the night getting later and later, until we would decide we now needed a treat, usually a milkshake, and the talking and bonding would continue. Good times!!! Then life got busier for both of us with our own family commitments and our only connection was through phone calls, but even that began to drop off until before we knew it, I had 3 kids married and 2 grandchildren born before we were able to see each other and connect once again tonight, at her daughter's wedding reception. I was nervous to see my friend, wondering if the years had erased the closeness we once felt, yet as we made eye contact, the tears started to flow. We wrapped our arms around each other and that embrace said it all. We are forever friends. She's my sister.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Nerves
No matter how many times I have to stand in front of people and take charge of something, I am ALWAYS nervous. My body reacts in embarrassing ways and I just want to crawl in a hole and hide. I DO feel more confident in myself as a person, but I wonder if I'll EVER feel comfortable being a "leader". I walk into church every week, trying to make sure I smile at, hug, talk to as many women as I can. It's a goal of mine to make everyone feel important, which they ARE, and I don't want anyone to feel invisible, although that's the state of being I would prefer to be in myself. I look at the back row, corner seat, longingly, but have to make the long walk up front. I keep thinking that after all these years, I would be more comfortable and certain things would become easier. Not so. As a young girl, playing the piano at a recital, hands and knees are shaking, head is nervously shaking, eyes twitch, and here we are years later, same thing. I find myself so preoccupied with trying to keep my body from going into convulsions, that I just might miss "reaching out" to someone and I've been told before that it has been interpreted as me being "uppity". Ouch! Yet I try so hard, and will keep trying, even though it would be much easier to stick my head in the sand.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Missing My Daddy
While out running errands today, driving on the freeway, thoughts of my Dad came to mind, just out of the blue. A feeling spread throughout my whole body until I was crying. What was that all about? Of course I think about my Dad often, and still miss him so much, even though he died 34 years ago. I miss what we had, and what we could've had; what my children and grandchildren could've had. I mourn the loss. But today I couldn't help wondering if my Dad, being where he is now, is thinking "this is no loss...just wait". Food for thought!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Birthday woes
I turned 50 last month. There...I said it! I thought my 40th was hard, but another decade has come and gone already. Wow! Life is going by much too quickly. I have literally lived my life in fear for the entire year leading up to this birthday. I guess that number has just always signified "old" to me and I don't consider myself old yet. I don't want to be old. I have found myself turning more to material things, spending money that I shouldn't to try to make myself feel younger; buy youth, I guess. The closer I got to March 23rd, the more I panicked. One day my good friend Sandie asked me why I was so upset. She told me, "it's just a number". My brother told me "it's just another day". A light turned on in my head and it caused me to do some reflecting. Would I really want to go back to any specific age I've already surpassed? No way! I'm having the time of my life. It just keeps getting better and better. That doesn't mean I haven't experienced trials, or won't again, but what I've learned in my 50 years is incredible. It's my life experiences that have taught me who I am; what I'm made of, given me confidence in myself; opened my eyes to so many things that I am grateful for. It's time to stop living my life in fear, but rather embrace what I've been given and take each new day as a gift. So now, I truly feel like celebrating. I love the lyrics "Celebrate, Celebrate, Dance to the music..."
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Work
Every tax season, when my part-time job becomes full-time, I find myself in awe of those who put in the standard 8 plus hr. day EVERY day. I come home to a house that needs attention, dinner that needs to be made, family members who deserve to have some of my time, other responsibilities that need attending to, and all I want to do is crash. April 15th is my light at the end of the tunnel, but to all those who work hard, day in and day out, I have great respect and admiration for. I don't know how you do it all. I'm so grateful to a husband who provides for our family, gets up each morning and goes to work at a job that has placed a tremendous amount of stress on his shoulders, yet he keeps going. With 2 days left until the craziness of tax season is over, as I put in my 10 hour work days, I refuse to whine.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
This is my first posting on my blog. Thank you Karen for creating it for me and Brittany for showing me how to use this. My newest, greatest love in life is being a grandma. This is my favorite grandson, Brandon. He's 11 months old. He is the cutest baby you've ever seen. He loves playing with my necklace choice of the day. Love this little guy.
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